Saturday, July 21, 2012

Hamster Wheel of Life.....

I have felt like a Hamster. Puffy cheeks and all, thanks to prednisone. I have jumped on that wheel quite a few times. Running from my health. Running from symptoms. Running as fast as I could. Guess what? This gal is tired and I realized I wasn't running anywhere. I was going nowhere. The good news is my faith is restored. My relationship with Jesus is strong. I may of been running nowhere, but I was not alone. So what have I been doing the past few years? I was working until this past March. This last hospital visit in March just confirmed what I already knew. I was tired. I mean truly exhausted. My health had been sliding downhill the past year. It wasn't a sudden change and all I knew while sitting in tears in that hospital bed....I needed to take care of me. I had to take care of myself before anyone else could. I was tired of smiling through the physical pain. I was tired of not being a Mommy to my two little boys. I was tired of not being a wife. My life consisted of working, coming home to bed, and on the weekends I had a couple hours of energy here and there. Now, I am able to rest when needed. I am able to be a mom and a wife again. I still have bad days, but they are much easier to deal with. I can take care of my self. I will save other blog posts about what specific health problems I have been dealing with.....don't want to tell ya all my happenings at once! Lol
So....Yes! I have jumped off that wheel of going nowhere. I am in the process of going from inactive to active on the kidney transplant list. It is taking FOREVER! lol but that is also another post. It feels good to be back.

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